The week that was

Goodness; I can't believe it's been a week since I've posted! THANKS for all the great tips and advice. I've got all sorts of good stuff added to my list of things to get during our 10-day return to the US between court and custody.

This week was good; got lots of stuff done. I'm hopeful that it's all going to come together perfectly during this upcoming week and that by this time next week we'll just be breathing deeply until we leave and not running around like crazy. We're paperchasing a few pieces and fulfilling a few last-minute requests from the judge that have added an extra layer of complexity, but we're approaching them with a positive, calm attitude and doing our best to get everything done. We will, however, continue to accept good thoughts and prayers to help us in these efforts! :)

Chime in

As I mentioned yesterday, I'm starting to make lists of things we need to take on both upcoming trips: court and custody. I'm mostly concerned about the custody trip, obviously.

So chime in. If you were going to be living in a hotel with two girls (one of whom will likely celebrate a 3rd birthday while we're there and the other will be approaching 4, but remember they've been living in a rural, sheltered orphanage and aren't used to the modern bells and whistles) for a lllloooonnnnggg time (we're looking at 16 days in Tver awaiting Russian passports before we head to Moscow to wait for US passports), what would you have on your list?

Keep the ideas coming - either here or in random e-mails to me. I welcome any and all ideas!

The state of affairs

Elation, puke, elation, puke, elation, puke.

Lists.

Elation, puke, elation, puke.

Paperwork (new), but doable.

Puke, elation, puke, elation.

More lists.

Long trip!

Universe: None of this is a complaint, whatsoever! Just the facts!

This is going to be a long court trip!

We'll likely travel on a Monday, arrive on Tuesday, do medicals and orphanage visits on Wednesday and Thursday, have half a day of court on Friday, have a weekend, endure some kind of holiday on Monday (I need to research what this is) and then have the second court sitting on Tuesday then travel Wednesday.

Wow!

P.S. To answer Anonymous' comment: Yes, we have two court sittings. Apparently the judge does a 1/2 day session all about documents and other information filed with the court and then on the second 1/2 day does more questioning about your family, household, parenting ideas, etc. At least that's what we've been told.

I think this is real...

This post is written with cautious optimism.

I think we have a court date.

I mean, we do have a court date, which was kind of communciated to us out of the blue. We were expecting word on if the judge would accept our mortgage letter and instead got an e-mail saying we were supposed to be in Russia in about three weeks. In adoption lingo, that's an EEEEEEEEEEEKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!

(I'm just not certain I'll really believe it until we're sitting in the court room being grilled by the judge.)

There are, of course, a gazillion stressful hoops to jump through, not the least of which is a quickly expiring federal government approval which essentially CANNOT expire (on June 5!!!; I've been working for WEEKS to try to get the government to respond to my requests of, "What do we need to do?!" and just got word late last week) or we're sunk. Insert social worker making a special trip to our home at 6 p.m. tonight and Holly working every piece of suggestive persuasion she can in getting everything we need from everyone to get it to the government in time to get it processed and back to us before the June 5 expiration.

And, I just got what I thought was the last batch of documents apostilled but found out I'll have to make ANOTHER trip to Topeka for revalidation of our psychiatric assessments (which I'm now coordinating getting from the psychiatrist), which "expired" May 13, since Russian courts only count medical stuff in our case as current for 3 months.

 But, now with an actual court date I have more ammo to beg people to help me. We'll likely leave in about three weeks, have a couple of days in Tver for redoing our Russian medicals (do.not.get.me.started) and visits with the girls (!!!) before two half-day court sessions. We'll likely be there over a weekend (bummer!) and finish up court early the following week. Then we'll likely come home as non-custodial parents, waiting out a 10-day appeal period that's standard. Then we'll likely return to take custody and wait in-country (for a long time) for their Russian and US passports, then come home.

Needless to say, I am SPINNING.

We're (shock of shocks) waiting

Our agency is checking to see if the judge will accept the letters we received yesterday from our mortgage company. They aren't notarized (as they indicated they wouldn't be) and essentially say that we've always been current on our mortgage. I'm not sure what we'll do if she declines to accept them. If she does, then I'll be able to make my thousandth apostille trip to Topeka and get this latest batch of redone (reformatted and refreshed) documents to our agency to be formally sent to Russia to be filed with the court.

Hoping, but have a pit in my gut that says we're in for more.

Contact...we'll see

Someone from the CEO's office called me just now. He's sending me 2 copies of letter stating we're current on our mortgage and always have been. He will sign it on color letterhead but swears there's no way to notarize it. How the CEO's office of a major bank doesn't have a notary is beyond me (read: yeah, right, sarcastically). I begged, the caller said he'd rather do it this way and that it would be obvious the documents weren't forgeries. I said, "Um, yeah, I agree but am not sure the judge will see it our way," but decided to take what he was offering at the moment and will see if I can get someone at a local branch notarize it, since it will be on letterhead from the office of the CEO.

If we fly this up the flagpole and it doesn't work I think I should at least have the name and contact information of today's caller/letter signer and he agreed that I could contact him again if the judge refuses what we provide.

So...while I don't think this will be slam dunk with the judge, it is SOMETHING and hopefully SOMETHING we can work with - or the start of something we can work with.

Today's effort

To answer a couple of questions left in the comment section from friends:

1 - the agency says it is a request I must fulfill.

2 - yes, I've previously played the media card, but just did so a bit more strongly...
On a (good) suggestion from someone in the media world, I've sent an e-mail to the press contact listed on Bank of America's website. I got an immediate out of office, but got three more e-mail addresses in media relations (to whom I immediately forwarded my e-mail) and...wait for it...a cell phone number. So now I'm feeling a bit better about at least trying. I'll use the cell phone number tomorrow if I don't hear back from one of these 4 - who have confirmed e-mail addresses.

My day off from the paperchase

I just couldn't do it today. Perhaps tonight I'll see if I can turn some of the names friends have researched from Internet sites into e-mail addresses and send a massive e-mail that continues my begging and pleading. I did not call customer service today. I have not heard from anyone, despite repeated professional communications, breakdowns, requests, begging and pleading, telephone calls, faxes, e-mails and overnight packages. I'm incredulous at the lack of basic decency to even respond to a customer, let alone fulfil my (really, honestly, what should be a simple) request. Even in my worst nightmares (and believe you there are many) I never thought the lack of a simple letter from our mortgage company could possibly derail this entire thing. Yet, here we are.

I've done all I can do

When I say I've taken this mortage letter issue as high as I can take it, I mean it.

Literally, I've just spent a likely wasted $20 on an overnight package to the CEO of Bank of America.

Spiritually, I have reached a point where I have to give this one up to the big guy. You know, the one I've been keeping from the rest of you while I cry and ask for help.

Today's phone call to yet another customer service person netted an entirely different story/explanation than the previous ones. Today she said she was trying yet another form of communication to the legal department asking for assistance on our behalf. By my count this is at least 4 different forms of communication; each person I speak with says something else and though I insist on speaking with a supervisor I never get one, but I'm assured they're involved with coming up with a solution.

And my good feelings about yesterday's rep were erradicated quickly when I realized the direct line he'd given me - and which I'd read back to him not once but twice - goes to a fax number.

So today I begged yet another person to get the same information that has been provided to legal, supposedly, a myriad of ways to do it yet again.

And I put it all in a package and overnighted it to the CEO. Like that will help.

I've done all I can. So, big guy, I've done all I can think to do. If any of my friends have suggestions, feel free. Otherwise I'm to the point where I think I need the ultimate help.

So frustrated!

I'm a good person.

I pay my bills, including my mortgage, on time.

Now, when I need a piece of flipping paper that says that, I not only can't get it, but I can't get an update about where my request stands.

To be fair, on my multiple-follow-up-call call this morning, a customer service rep did provide a level of service that didn't have me steaming. He had his manager send an expedited e-mail to the legal department (apparently the only way for communication from this department to legal) to whom my document request was forwarded last week telling them that I needed an update and that it was IMPORTANT and to please call me.

And, you guessed it, no call. So, now I'm getting ready to attempt to send an e-mail via a super-sectretly obtained possible e-mail address to see if it gets to the company's legal counsel with some begging, and a mention of our previous media coverage, thrown in.

I'm so disheartened by everyone except our close circle of friends and family. They've been wonderful, but my faith in everyone else is totally gone. I'm disillusioned, tired and emotionally weary. Our federal government approval expires next month and I can't get a clear explanation of what I need to do to extend it; I overnighted them a package a few weeks ago with a request for an extension of our approval but haven't heard back from them, so I have no idea where that stands, nor do I know where to go to find out.

I know, I know. I sound like a broken record. But...I feel like a broken record.