So, while it's not overwhelmingly massive, I'm excited about an update I received today! Our social worker has assigned our case to a contract social worker and we can get things moving! Our main social worker (let's call her Social Worker A) told us when we met with her in June that she was looking for a contract social worker to help with international home studies because her current contract worker had just been tapped to lead the local office of...our adoption agency! We were in a bit of a holding pattern until the new social worker was determined, since Social Worker A's schedule was so full.
So now I have a real live person with a name who is supposed to get with me to schedule our interviews and the home study (let's call her Social Worker B). Hooray! I was trying to feel really calm about it all and was doing pretty well, but every day that went by increased my potential to go absolutely insane with not being able to DO anything. But, with the introduction to Social Worker B, I was reminded that sometimes things ARE "doing" ... I just don't always see it first hand!
Tuesday, July 29, 2008
Dog days of summer
Not much adoption-wise to fill you in on. I'm working hard to be calm, cool and collected about "stuff" that's out of my hands right now, namely the paperwork our references and parents have to fill out for our home study. I think many of them are turned in (you all rock!) and others are in the works (you all rock, too!) and we're awaiting word on what's next.
We have a former foster dog with us this week while her family's on vacation. She is such a sweet girl. She went by many names when she was here (our adoption group called her Candy, which didn't work for me, so I called her Annie and then Niblet because she's such a little thing), but now her name is Maya. She has been to visit numerous times since she went to her forever home and she has grown up SO much! She has settled in perfectly this time around. I came home for lunch yesterday and they were all miffed that I'd woken them up! Ah, the life!
I'll keep you updated when and if we hear more about adoption stuff. I'm handling the "out of my control" stuff pretty well, but if anyone has mantras, chants, prayers or other suggestions I definitely won't turn them away!
We have a former foster dog with us this week while her family's on vacation. She is such a sweet girl. She went by many names when she was here (our adoption group called her Candy, which didn't work for me, so I called her Annie and then Niblet because she's such a little thing), but now her name is Maya. She has been to visit numerous times since she went to her forever home and she has grown up SO much! She has settled in perfectly this time around. I came home for lunch yesterday and they were all miffed that I'd woken them up! Ah, the life!
I'll keep you updated when and if we hear more about adoption stuff. I'm handling the "out of my control" stuff pretty well, but if anyone has mantras, chants, prayers or other suggestions I definitely won't turn them away!
Thursday, July 24, 2008
What it's all about
I jumped on the boards this morning before getting ready for work and found a post from my friend, Nancy, about the one-year anniversary of their wonderful family. She posted a link to a video she'd made celebrating the first 365 days with their son, Nathan, who came home from Russia.
Her video made me cry, I told her, and gave me goosebumps. And it made me dream.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IBQjfr12N7w&fmt=18
Her video made me cry, I told her, and gave me goosebumps. And it made me dream.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IBQjfr12N7w&fmt=18
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
We're reunited!
The 20th high school reunion extravaganza weekend drew to a close on Sunday. What a strange, fun, awkward and bizarre trip down memory lane! We had a BBQ at our house on Friday evening for some of my friends and their families, then the big event was on Saturday (where there were 3, count 'em, 3, people beyond the Friday crew that I really cared to talk to and catch up with!); after the reunion our group went to a bar by the high school and chatted. Another BBQ Sunday afternoon at a friend's parents house here in the area was the last official reunion weekend event and then Brian and I came home and crashed (he also had to work most of the day on Saturday).
It was great to reconnect with friends who knew me back in the day and we had a fun time quilting all of our memories together. We're scattered hither and yon these days (Atlanta, Virginia, Wichita) so it was great to have them all in town and to do the "remember whens".
But, what was better was learning about my friends as who they are now - about their significant others, their livelihoods, their kids, their current hopes, dreams and challenges. As much as I liked them all in high school I have to say I'm even happier with and more proud of them all now!
Adoption-wise our reference letters are hitting the mailboxes of friends and family - thanks to all who have graciously accepted this challenge! Please let us know if there is ANYTHING you need from us to make your task easier!
I'll keep you posted about any other updates!
It was great to reconnect with friends who knew me back in the day and we had a fun time quilting all of our memories together. We're scattered hither and yon these days (Atlanta, Virginia, Wichita) so it was great to have them all in town and to do the "remember whens".
But, what was better was learning about my friends as who they are now - about their significant others, their livelihoods, their kids, their current hopes, dreams and challenges. As much as I liked them all in high school I have to say I'm even happier with and more proud of them all now!
Adoption-wise our reference letters are hitting the mailboxes of friends and family - thanks to all who have graciously accepted this challenge! Please let us know if there is ANYTHING you need from us to make your task easier!
I'll keep you posted about any other updates!
Wednesday, July 16, 2008
From my document storage box to her desk: Home study paperwork submitted!
Sigh of relief from this end - I've (finally!) dropped off our home study paperwork at our social worker's office. The only tiny pieces missing are Brian's TB test and his doctor's appointment. But, those aren't mandatory for being able to schedule our interviews and the home visit, so I went ahead and took the completed paperwork by this afternoon. I figured we didn't do them all to have them sit on our dining room table (and I did finally get the banking information after repeatedly following up).
While I did expect confetti to burst from the ceiling as the social worker's office erupted in excited congratulations (not really, but it's kind of a nice fantasy), I received a very nice, "OK. Thank you!" as the representative behind the desk took my well organized paperwork out of the clear plastic document box/storage container thing. I wanted to say, "Oh, be careful, our pictures are going to fall out!" and then figured that the nice lady knew what she was doing and that I didn't need to pepper her with questions about what happens next and when I'll hear from them again and how it goes from here and on and on.
Then I came home and e-mailed the social worker. I'm trying...honestly, but I couldn't help myself!
My hope is that the answer is that we can schedule our individual interviews and home study visit and at least have them on the calendar. We'll see if that's anywhere near to reality.
I have to say thanks to all who exclaimed "No way!" when I mentioned my upcoming 20-year high school reunion (and to my friends who didn't take umbrage when I called them old...I'm sure they know that I mean old as in from my high school years and not old as in "oh, my hip...which I have been saying, by the way). It's hard for me to believe it's been 20 years. I'm not sure if I'd have believed you on a lot of fronts if you'd told me then where I'd be now and what I'd be doing...but there's no place I'd rather be or nothing I'd rather be doing!
While I did expect confetti to burst from the ceiling as the social worker's office erupted in excited congratulations (not really, but it's kind of a nice fantasy), I received a very nice, "OK. Thank you!" as the representative behind the desk took my well organized paperwork out of the clear plastic document box/storage container thing. I wanted to say, "Oh, be careful, our pictures are going to fall out!" and then figured that the nice lady knew what she was doing and that I didn't need to pepper her with questions about what happens next and when I'll hear from them again and how it goes from here and on and on.
Then I came home and e-mailed the social worker. I'm trying...honestly, but I couldn't help myself!
My hope is that the answer is that we can schedule our individual interviews and home study visit and at least have them on the calendar. We'll see if that's anywhere near to reality.
I have to say thanks to all who exclaimed "No way!" when I mentioned my upcoming 20-year high school reunion (and to my friends who didn't take umbrage when I called them old...I'm sure they know that I mean old as in from my high school years and not old as in "oh, my hip...which I have been saying, by the way). It's hard for me to believe it's been 20 years. I'm not sure if I'd have believed you on a lot of fronts if you'd told me then where I'd be now and what I'd be doing...but there's no place I'd rather be or nothing I'd rather be doing!
Monday, July 14, 2008
Oh so close!
We are SOCLOSE to having all of the home study paperwork done. At this point I'm considering waiting until we have every last piece of paper, but knowing me I'll take our stuff over to the social worker's office on Wednesday so we can maybe use what we have to get some meetings scheduled - because the stuff we need for that part is definitely done!
I posted an update to my last post after Brian picked up the computer and started writing his autobiography. He finished it up yesterday morning. Our approaches were SO different and our autobiographies SO different as a result! He was deliberate, thoughtful, serious. I was casual, quick and wrote off-the-cuff. I think his is better; he thinks mine is better. Maybe this is a perfect example of how (and why!) we get along so well! It was like that old story about the lady cutting her hair to buy her husband...what was it? Then he sold something that the what was it would be used for to buy her a comb for her hair. Maybe it was a chain for a watch that she was going to get and he sold the watch? You know the one I mean! ANYWAY I wrote in mine how I so wanted him to be a dad and he wrote in his about wanting me to be a mom -it again confirmed that we're doing the right thing since we were so on the same page, even as they were being written!
Today Brian got his fingers printed here in Shawnee - and, strangely, his experience was different from mine! I went on Thursday and had an officer who handled things one way; Brian went today and had one handle it totally differently! Go figure.
Now all we have left to do is get our bank to fax back the form I sent them about our money management (48-hour turnaround? Yeah, right.) and have Brian do his TB test and doctor's visit. But, like I said, those aren't deal breakers for us to be able to get some visits scheduled.
This week also brings my...SIGH...20-year high school reunion. We're having a group of my old friends over on Friday evening and then the reunion itself is Saturday. I was going to pass on this one, but my friends are actually GOING to this one, when they didn't for the 10th (though I did, hence my reticence to go to this one!) Brian's looking forward to meeting these people I talk about and seeing the folks I went to high school with. I'm just hoping the $108 we paid for heavy appetizers means I can pile a plate of food up and get our money's worth. Wish us luck!
I posted an update to my last post after Brian picked up the computer and started writing his autobiography. He finished it up yesterday morning. Our approaches were SO different and our autobiographies SO different as a result! He was deliberate, thoughtful, serious. I was casual, quick and wrote off-the-cuff. I think his is better; he thinks mine is better. Maybe this is a perfect example of how (and why!) we get along so well! It was like that old story about the lady cutting her hair to buy her husband...what was it? Then he sold something that the what was it would be used for to buy her a comb for her hair. Maybe it was a chain for a watch that she was going to get and he sold the watch? You know the one I mean! ANYWAY I wrote in mine how I so wanted him to be a dad and he wrote in his about wanting me to be a mom -it again confirmed that we're doing the right thing since we were so on the same page, even as they were being written!
Today Brian got his fingers printed here in Shawnee - and, strangely, his experience was different from mine! I went on Thursday and had an officer who handled things one way; Brian went today and had one handle it totally differently! Go figure.
Now all we have left to do is get our bank to fax back the form I sent them about our money management (48-hour turnaround? Yeah, right.) and have Brian do his TB test and doctor's visit. But, like I said, those aren't deal breakers for us to be able to get some visits scheduled.
This week also brings my...SIGH...20-year high school reunion. We're having a group of my old friends over on Friday evening and then the reunion itself is Saturday. I was going to pass on this one, but my friends are actually GOING to this one, when they didn't for the 10th (though I did, hence my reticence to go to this one!) Brian's looking forward to meeting these people I talk about and seeing the folks I went to high school with. I'm just hoping the $108 we paid for heavy appetizers means I can pile a plate of food up and get our money's worth. Wish us luck!
Thursday, July 10, 2008
More "funny words" for my life story
Hooray - I've been fingerprinted!
I got to take advantage of my local police department today and use their services for the local fingerprinting required for our home study. You can either be fingerprinted where you live or where you work, so we might have another experience to share when Brian does his if he takes advantage of the Olathe Police Department services!
I am kind of disappointed - I wanted blackened fingers smudged with ink to show for my efforts, but alas, the fingerprinting is computerized. A long arm of the law gentleman took straight scans of my fingers and thumb, then rolled each finger and thumb. I was told I had very nice prints - apparently some people can have difficult ridges and whorls but mine were great. I told the officer I'd been working on them.
These prints go off to the Kansas Bureau of Investigation to make sure that we're not nefarious criminals with dark, sordid pasts.
We will eventually have to get fingerprinted for the feds, as well, but that will come after our home study is complete and we send it and our I-600A to the USCIS.
I also got my home study doctor's appointment out of the way - and got to see my old friends at the infertility doctor's office. They are all very excited for us and promised to help in any way possible. I was touched when the the doctor, when asked on the form "Do you know of anything related to personality, physical condition or past history not already explained which would affect patient's ability to take on the responsibilities of parenthood?" wrote, "They would make exemplary parents."
I also learned that my doctor...speaks Russian! He asked me if I spoke any and I said that I didn't but that I wanted to learn phrases such as, "Excuse me, I'm sorry for offending you culturally; I am a stupid American." and he started gabbing away in Russian! I asked where he learned and he said in high school. I already knew from past experiences that he grew up in Topeka, Kan., where I grew up and I said, "You learned Russian in high school in TOPEKA?!" Who would have thunk it? He promised to teach me some phrases I would NOT want to say while in Russia! Maybe I'll take him up on it...no, wait. I'd probably accidentally only remember those!
So, home study wise we're about 90% there. I just have to get my TB results tomorrow, have Brian do his TB test, doctors appointment and, oh yeah, write that autobiography of his! Otherwise I think we've got it in the can...or the plastic file folder, at least!
UPDATE: 10:28 p.m. I just have to brag on my rock-star husband. He left work at a decent hour, picked up the laptop and went to town on his autobiography! I didn't give him enough credit - I thought he was just going to write down answers to the questions on the outline/guide, but he's really putting a lot of effort into his story. Oops. I'm not supposed to call it that, as he claims, still (like he did on our first date) that he doesn't have a story. Yeah, right.
I got to take advantage of my local police department today and use their services for the local fingerprinting required for our home study. You can either be fingerprinted where you live or where you work, so we might have another experience to share when Brian does his if he takes advantage of the Olathe Police Department services!
I am kind of disappointed - I wanted blackened fingers smudged with ink to show for my efforts, but alas, the fingerprinting is computerized. A long arm of the law gentleman took straight scans of my fingers and thumb, then rolled each finger and thumb. I was told I had very nice prints - apparently some people can have difficult ridges and whorls but mine were great. I told the officer I'd been working on them.
These prints go off to the Kansas Bureau of Investigation to make sure that we're not nefarious criminals with dark, sordid pasts.
We will eventually have to get fingerprinted for the feds, as well, but that will come after our home study is complete and we send it and our I-600A to the USCIS.
I also got my home study doctor's appointment out of the way - and got to see my old friends at the infertility doctor's office. They are all very excited for us and promised to help in any way possible. I was touched when the the doctor, when asked on the form "Do you know of anything related to personality, physical condition or past history not already explained which would affect patient's ability to take on the responsibilities of parenthood?" wrote, "They would make exemplary parents."
I also learned that my doctor...speaks Russian! He asked me if I spoke any and I said that I didn't but that I wanted to learn phrases such as, "Excuse me, I'm sorry for offending you culturally; I am a stupid American." and he started gabbing away in Russian! I asked where he learned and he said in high school. I already knew from past experiences that he grew up in Topeka, Kan., where I grew up and I said, "You learned Russian in high school in TOPEKA?!" Who would have thunk it? He promised to teach me some phrases I would NOT want to say while in Russia! Maybe I'll take him up on it...no, wait. I'd probably accidentally only remember those!
So, home study wise we're about 90% there. I just have to get my TB results tomorrow, have Brian do his TB test, doctors appointment and, oh yeah, write that autobiography of his! Otherwise I think we've got it in the can...or the plastic file folder, at least!
UPDATE: 10:28 p.m. I just have to brag on my rock-star husband. He left work at a decent hour, picked up the laptop and went to town on his autobiography! I didn't give him enough credit - I thought he was just going to write down answers to the questions on the outline/guide, but he's really putting a lot of effort into his story. Oops. I'm not supposed to call it that, as he claims, still (like he did on our first date) that he doesn't have a story. Yeah, right.
Tuesday, July 8, 2008
More words I thought I'd never say...
So the other day I kept laughing about using the phrase "Our social worker." Today I added another phrase to the list..."I have to go have my TB test."
One of the requirements of our home study process is a TB test, so I took myself to the Johnson County Health Department for my test. I have to go back Thursday or Friday for the results - they do a little injection-type thing and your body shows visible signs of exposure to TB, apparently. I also made my doctor's appointment, also necessary for the home study. I decided to just go back and see my fertility specialist, since I haven't been back since the IVF and it was part of the "package." I figured I might as well just double up, go see Dr. Stewart and make him fill out my adoption paperwork!
Other than that, we're finishing up home study paperwork...now I just have to get Brian to write his autobiography!
One of the requirements of our home study process is a TB test, so I took myself to the Johnson County Health Department for my test. I have to go back Thursday or Friday for the results - they do a little injection-type thing and your body shows visible signs of exposure to TB, apparently. I also made my doctor's appointment, also necessary for the home study. I decided to just go back and see my fertility specialist, since I haven't been back since the IVF and it was part of the "package." I figured I might as well just double up, go see Dr. Stewart and make him fill out my adoption paperwork!
Other than that, we're finishing up home study paperwork...now I just have to get Brian to write his autobiography!
Saturday, July 5, 2008
Clean clothes, autobiographies
For the first time in our adult lives, we had to go buy a clothes washer yesterday.
We've always just...acquired...clothes washers (and dryers!) over the years. First I had a set from my grandmother, then we had a set from our friends Roger and Karen. Then Brian's dad gave us a washer and all continued to be well in the world of undergarments, T-shirts and shorts.
And then two weeks ago, the door lock on the washer started to stay on. We thought it might be a timer issue, so we dropped $100 on a new one. Psych. That didn't fix it. We figured out a workaround. Until a few days ago when the washer decided it never wanted to get to the spin cycle, so while clothes were clean and not sitting in a tub of water, they were still drippingly, soakingly wet.
So yesterday we bit the bullet and went and got a new clothes washer. I'm happy to report it is swishing away as I write...now we just hope the dryer decides to keep working for a while!
This weekend is all about home study paperwork (and things like Brian changing the oil in my car, vehicle washes, a trip to the library and maybe to the tennis courts after we raided Brian's dad's basement yesterday for a couple of racquets after we discovered over lunch that we both used to love to play. We'll see...wish us luck!
I wrote the requisite autobiography for our home study yesterday and Bri promises he'll do his today. Then we crank through some additional forms with the goal of having them to our social worker this week. She's been out of town visiting a new grandbaby but will be back this week so we'll see how we can fit into her schedule.
On a totally unrelated note, the cute little house next door finally has some life in it again. The new owner's been moving in...and we have a new dog in the neighborhood! Our guys can't quite figure out just why they can't see the other canine through the wooden privacy fence.
Have a great weekend, all!
We've always just...acquired...clothes washers (and dryers!) over the years. First I had a set from my grandmother, then we had a set from our friends Roger and Karen. Then Brian's dad gave us a washer and all continued to be well in the world of undergarments, T-shirts and shorts.
And then two weeks ago, the door lock on the washer started to stay on. We thought it might be a timer issue, so we dropped $100 on a new one. Psych. That didn't fix it. We figured out a workaround. Until a few days ago when the washer decided it never wanted to get to the spin cycle, so while clothes were clean and not sitting in a tub of water, they were still drippingly, soakingly wet.
So yesterday we bit the bullet and went and got a new clothes washer. I'm happy to report it is swishing away as I write...now we just hope the dryer decides to keep working for a while!
This weekend is all about home study paperwork (and things like Brian changing the oil in my car, vehicle washes, a trip to the library and maybe to the tennis courts after we raided Brian's dad's basement yesterday for a couple of racquets after we discovered over lunch that we both used to love to play. We'll see...wish us luck!
I wrote the requisite autobiography for our home study yesterday and Bri promises he'll do his today. Then we crank through some additional forms with the goal of having them to our social worker this week. She's been out of town visiting a new grandbaby but will be back this week so we'll see how we can fit into her schedule.
On a totally unrelated note, the cute little house next door finally has some life in it again. The new owner's been moving in...and we have a new dog in the neighborhood! Our guys can't quite figure out just why they can't see the other canine through the wooden privacy fence.
Have a great weekend, all!
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